Nirvana

Today is a PJ day, or in #1’s words “pajammy” day. #1 and #2 are both in their PJs at 3:20pm EST. The only reason TH and I are clothed is because I ran on the treadmill (done early so I could justify some wine later in the day-and now is technically later) and remain in my leggings and t-shirt, and TH is out blowing leaves. So yeah, we’re all pretty gross. But 2 cases of strep (TH and me, not the germpits…errr kiddos), an upset tummy (#1, I am looking at you) and the ever cranky #2 (seriously, how bad can it be to have every single of your needs met on a daily basis) who needs to be “fancy” (another favored term by #1)?

And dinner has been cooking all day; I got my act together and put a black bean chili in the crockpot this morning, I’ll use leftovers for enchiladas tomorrow. (Are you there God? It’s me, Martha). Yum.

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Alex Oveckin brings tears to our household

I have mentioned The Husband’s rabid fanaticism for hockey. He has corrupted #1son as well, so today they’re off to development camp for the Washington Caps at Kettler. Be still my beating heart. #1 son has had his Ovechkin jersey on for hours now and in order to eliminate tears once they arrive at camp, TH decided to let #1 know now that Ovechkin, Mike Green, etc won’t be at camp, and that Ovechkin is not even in town. Being almost five years old (and male) #1 heard only part of the conversation and his eyes started welling. He heard “Ovechkin is gone.” With a trembling lip he cried “I don’t want Ovechkin to leave.”

We had to quickly calm him down and explain (again) that Ovechkin is only on vacation and visiting his mom and dad in Russia, but he’ll be back in a month or so. With a new understanding of the situation, #1 calmed down and resumed his imitation of a hockey player, complete with police riot helmet. (He doesn’t have an actual hockey helmet, so he uses the riot helmet from his dress up clothes collection) I thought I had a little more time before there was crying over Ovechkin and fully expected it to come from The Husband when the Caps push for The Cup in the coming years. The love for Mr. Ovechkin runs deep in our household.

Wipe Out

I knew I would be exhausted with a second child. I knew keeping up with an infant and preschooler would be tough. I also knew that I was not guaranteed a good sleeper the second time, I had been incredibly spoiled with #1 son. But dear God, the level of exhaustion I and TH feel is nothing we have ever felt before. Not only does #2 son think he does not need sleep, but when he does crash he is often up at 5am (or earlier) for the day. We keep reminding #2 that his saving grace is his cuteness, or else he would be put up on Ebay (though it would probably be pulled from auction, like used underwear).

There is a reason that sleep deprivation is used as a torture method, it is awful. It causes the most cheerful couple to snap at one another and give The Look. There are many mornings I feel hungover only to remember that I had nothing with alcohol the day before. A new guy at work keeps whining how tired he is (he has a newborn) and looking to me for sympathy. Ha, wrong audience mister. TH and I keep reminding each other that this too shall pass (like when the kids go to college in 14 and 18 years respectively) but some days that thought is difficult to remember.

If He Really Loved Me

I have a feeling that The Husband really doesn’t care about me, or our kids. I have been trying to help him find a job and he has turned down the last 3 suggestions I made. He won’t even submit a resume which I find incredibly selfish. His argument is 1. he has a well paying job thank you very much and 2. I keep suggesting things that could get him killed. Eh, the life insurance is paid up.

Since it’s summer and we’re in reality TV hell we keep watching shows that while dangerous appear to generate a lot of money in a relatively short amount of time. The first thing he rejected was being a crab fisherman, a la Deadliest Catch. Apparently braving the Bering Sea and beating ice off a fishing boat don’t interest him. The second job was being a coal miner in WVa (we saw this on 30 Days). Aside from the obvious (living in WVa) he moaned about a cave in or black lung (I would put him in an iron lung if necessary.) He also bemoaned the fact that the annual salary wasn’t that high. I retorted that in WVa it is, which leads us back to reason #1 for not being a coal miner. Third in line was driving the ice road in Canada. (Ice Road Truckers) He actually gave me no specific reason; he just glared at me and said “Fuck no.” He’d only need to work 8 WEEKS and then he could eat all of the bons bons he wanted. So, the ice is only about 28 inches thick and cracks all along the way, he most likely would be fine. Where is his sense of adventure, his drive to support his family? I guess I still need to check out Black Gold.

Pure Joy

The Husband, myself, #1 and #2 sons went to TH’s family reunion this weekend. It was held at an amusement park in Pennsylvania and the last time we went #1 son was 2 years old and #2 son was not even a consideration. This year #1 son was old enough to be really into the rides. The look on his face as he came down the log flume was worth the 4 hour drive up and down mountains, the expensive gas and being in BFE. (Do I hear banjos?) His mouth was a wide open grin, his eyes totally lit up and he could not contain his excitement and energy when he got off the ride.

It was one of those water rides where you come off completely soaked to the skin. As an adult the idea of sitting in wet underwear all day grosses me out, but to an almost 5 year old, it’s just proof that he was tall enough for the big rides. I told TH later than evening as we headed to our hotel, that is why we had kids, just to experience life as a little kid again. I think TH and I needed that, since we’ve been battling sleep deprivation for many months, to the extent that we were wondering why we just didn’t stick with cats.

Dealing with my issues

After another outburst this morning, my husband suggested I deal with my issues. My level of anger is not normal and it needs a better outlet. I agree with him to an extent, but really there are so many craptastic children’s programs on TV, I cannot help but yell at them.

Today’s victim was Oswald on Noggin. We’ve never see this show and after this morning’s episode I am banning it from future viewing. I appreciate shows that are witty, humorous and/or unique. Oswald was none of these. I got particularly enraged when Oswald’s dog Weenie (big surprise, the dog is a dachshund-real clever there) was trying to draw everyone’s attention to the fact that a woodpecker was very close to knocking down a support beam under a tent. Oswald spent 5 minutes saying “What’s wrong Weenie?” as Weenie very clearly was barking at the base of the support beam. Did Oswald look up once? No, he kept whining because he might lose the best pet contest. Luckily for Oswald and friends (and unlucky for me as I would have preferred that they all get crushed by the tent as it fell) Oswald finally pulled his head out of his ass and looked up. How frickin’ hard was that?

The few minutes that the above was taking place were incredibly painful to me, my preschooler would have figured out that he needed to look up about twenty minutes before big, stupid, teeny hat wearing Oswald. This is educational? Five hours later I am still incensed just thinking about it. Whoever created Oswald is an assclown.

Cleaning for the Cleaning Lady

Since our work servers are down to more severe weather (I swear locusts or the plague are coming any time now) I have a had a few spare moments this afternoon. I didn’t go get coffee, read a book or just veg. No I performed the most ridiculous chore know to mankind, according to The Husband (TH): cleaning for the cleaning company. They come every other week and the day before is spent straightening and putting away so they can actually tackle our dirt.

This drives TH batty, which in turn drives me batty. The crew has been coming for over 2 years, the every other week pick up is a part of our life, get over it. Admittedly I am the neat freak around here and according to TH “unless there are feces or roaches, I don’t care.” I am beyond horrified at this statement. I have been to his parents’ house many times, he was not raised by wolves and his parents’ house is always very neat.

Because we both work full time and want to spend the rest of the time with our kids, we sub out the cleaning part. This bugs me because I actually like to clean, but just can’t fit it in to my packed schedule. So instead we pay someone else and I threaten to crotch punch TH twice a month as he mocks the process of cleaning for the cleaning people.

Remember 120 Minutes?

I used to love watching this on Sunday nights when I was in high school and supposed to be asleep (that’s what my parents get for allowing a TV in my room), I think it was on around 11pm. I had started watching it so I could be cool and talk about the music with my high school crush, but even after that faded I continued to tune into the show. That was many years ago and I hadn’t thought about 120 minutes in forever.

Cue 4:30 this morning and VH1 Classic (WTF, how am I old enough to be “classic”). There before my eyes was Mathew Sweet with Girlfriend, Soundgarden with a baby faced Chris Cornell (the years have been VERY good to him-yum) and Siouxise with her Banshees. What a time warp. Of course watching 120 Minutes early this morning was a totally different experience altogether. I wasn’t watching so I could throw out band names while I leaned against my locker and made googly eyes at some high school senior with a crappy car (but boomin’ sound system of course) and loads of personal teenage baggage. I was watching because #2 son had been awake for about an hour and had grown tired of his dear old dad. My how times have changed.

Whooo, Hooo- The Cup has been Awarded- Now give me my spouse back

The Stanley Cup that is. Yes, I know this occurred last week but between a power outage, downed tree, serious home improvement project and banging my head against the wall, I am a little behind. I am still happy that the 2007-08 NHL season is over. It’s hockey all the time in our house and now I get an ever so slight break (development camp starts July 7th of course) My husband didn’t even like the contenders for the Cup, but because grown men on tiny blades were involved he had to watch every minute of play. (Except when we lost power before Game 6, that must have sucked)

One good thing came out of the finals other than my husband noticing our youngest child is now 7 months old (this is what happens when the birth of a child occurs during the season); I learned that Little Caesars Pizza still exists in parts of the US, who knew? Not that I am jonesing for a pizza from there or anything (I don’t think I have ever tasted it) but it brought back childhood memories of a little Roman guy yelling Pizza! Pizza! I was wondering what happened to him and his toga.

One question

At what point in their lives do males learn to get out of the shower and shake everything they’ve got in your direction, thinking it’s the funniest thing ever? I will let you decide whether I am talking about the 4 year old or almost 40 year old in my house. It would never occur to me to do this, yet from discussions I have had with other women, I am not the only one experiencing this post shower show. Seriously, it’s not a pretty sight.